03 March 2015

Change your Perspective, Change your Life #AvalancheofGood

Everyday I get up and send out good thoughts, every single day regardless of what is going on in my life and there is tons that goes on! Every day I hear many responses to what I send out and today I think it is time to let you all know what actually does go on in my life, not because I am looking for sympathy of any kind but because sometimes in this very busy human life of ours I think we lose perspective on the fact that EVERYONE has crap that goes on that makes life difficult for them....but changing how you approach it is a choice, it really is and before I realized that I struggled under years and years of worry, depression, feelings of inadequacy and well searching continually for something that would alleviate the state of my mind and the constant noise that would not let me sleep. This is a part of my story and part of what would have gone into the book that I have been writing for as many years as I could spell I guess, but now here we are and I think it is more beneficial to rip that band aid right off long before The Cracked Cauldron is ever released......

When I tell you that you should get up each morning and think a Good thought even before you get out of bed I tell you this because that is how I found my way out of that darkness of my soul, I never say try; I always say DO! the moment you say try you have already accepted failing.....inherent in the word try is the acceptance of failure as an end result, DON'T try! DO!! get up each morning and do it, each day it will get easier and the negativeness will quiet down over time. Next when I say DO NOT judge! I say this not because I do not know the consequences of judgement, I mean hello! look at my life! of course I judged, I did it, I admit it....I judged because I was stuck in this awful place where I could not look at my own life, yes because of the state of it, yes because it was easier to pass judgement on others that hurt me rather than to face them, discuss it or even try to mend it. I have learnt the hard way that judgement does nothing but bring you the life that you stand high and mighty over.....never thought I would so understand the life my mother led to get her to the place where she ended up emotionally, but yet here I am living that same life, feeling the same about the people in my life that are parallelled to hers, so I get up everyday and thank the Gods that I can see clearly and I send out good thoughts. My twenty-one year old son gets up everyday knowing that he has a brain tumour and will require injections for the rest of his life to simply try to lead a somewhat physically normal life but he keeps going, he finds artful and practical ways to cope with the disabilities this leaves him with, he doesn't complain or give up, and he sends out good everyday. My husband and daughter cope with varying degrees of mental health issues with grace, dignity and hold their heads up even when they have bad days they still keep going and try to help where they can, and me well we all know my physical health is just a bad joke, I cope and keep going; so you see every single day in our household we deal with disease, mental illness and other aspects of life that attempt to break our spirit...not mention the poverty, lack and constant struggle to keep food on the table, the lights on and the heat going.....that never ends. We never try in our household we DO because we have no choice, each one of us relies on the other to keep us going emotionally and mentally, and it is with that support and heart that I send out what I do everyday to all of you. Like me there is a ton more out there, all you have to do is look through the responses to yesterday's circle call on Witch's Chamber what we all live through is hard shit, posts like those give us a place to lean on each other, we find comfort in community, reaching out and in giving support it lifts us up out of our own and little by little opens our eyes to see that others are also going through it, and to each of us our own lives always appear to be the worst......but a shared burden allows it to ride on more shoulders, thereby lightening our own load.

All this being said I realize it is hard to do this, to change the way you look at the world; to change how you perceive that around you is probably one of the hardest things you can do in life. It will not happen in a day, it will not happen in a week, hell it could take years for you to finally sit down and suddenly realize that HOLY CRAP the way I look at things is so different than it used to be! but notice I said realize, because the truth is the moment you start getting up each morning and taking that moment before you even get up to think good thoughts, send good thoughts and let even just the light of the Sun fill you with warmth you have just created a lasting change in your own life. Imagine that you were going to this place that you loved going to as a child for me it would have been the Canadian National Exhibition or CNE in downtown Toronto, each year as it would open I would be ever so excited to go there, even though I had been every year, knew all the rides I still loved going....normally the night before we were going I would not even sleep! that anticipation, excitement and just happiness at seeing the Sun shine in my window that morning is now what I feel each day when I get up and the Sun is shining at me, reminding me that I made it another day, another wonderful day to make a difference in my life and the life of those that I come in contact with....each moment is a chance to begin again and start to feel the good that comes into life, take pleasures in the simple things and let them guide you back to those feelings.....when it is too hard to do on your own then reach out, to friends, family, me.....just reach out, our only way through the mess the world is in is to help each other up, so be one that helps or if need be reach out and let someone else help you up.....the day will come when you will be in a place to pay it forward and help another do the same.

I challenge you all to Change your PERSPECTIVE and Change your LIFE.

Today I sit here and send you all love and support, I send good thoughts that those that feel in the dark find their light, that those that feel alone find community, and that all that you feel you lack comes to find you, by the Gods I will it so. Everyday I send good, everyday I add to the #AvalancheofGood and everyday I have faith that it will grow and encompass all that need the good feelings, love and hope that collectively we send out! 

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