2015 Yule Letter

Once again I have been away from my blog for a very extended amount of time, so much was going in my world that it was almost impossible at times to catch my breath....a whirlwind of change swept through our lives along with some very tough health issues for me this time...now finally at the end of the calendar year as I embrace Yule, I am finally able to speak, write and breathe, it almost feels good....almost.....there is an odd space in my heart and mind now that is not sure how to let this flow anymore so bear with me as I fumble around here, with my stilted sharing....it is amazing how hard this is for me now as I write this Yule Letter!

I would like to wish everyone a very Merry Yule and Happy Holidays no matter what you may celebrate; may it be in the company of those you love! This is a major year for our family, as this year started we were planning to visit our daughter as she was expecting our grandbaby; that visit turned into a more permanent situation! Seven months later we finally were able to go and get our adult children that were still 2 provinces away and all of our ~ well most of ~ our belongings, and of course my familiars that were waiting ever so impatiently there! It was hard and very costly and quickly put us back in the same situation we had worked so very hard to pull ourselves out of, poverty....my shop took a hit as well and is barely inching along, but when push came to shove all we could do was desperately pull our family back together rather than leave it split across 2 provinces. Costly or not, poverty or not there is not one iota of regret in my heart for what we did if anything there is more of a warm glow knowing that someday I will tell our little Jo how she pulled the family together and made it so we could never go away again, although her little eyes as they look in mine already seem to know how very special she is.

We are all starting over now, all five of us, each of us in our way....It will get better, I keep telling them all, and in my heart I know it will, one step at a time, one foot in front of the other we will keep putting it all back together, the family, our home....the challenges for us are always so large, the lights at the end of the tunnels though don't seem so distant now that we are surrounded by family. Here my son can get even better treatment for his brain tumor, I am able to get a doctor ~ first appointment Jan 4th! ~ and we are all eligible for medication subsidy finally! by mid February we should be all taken care of! these things may not seem so huge but when medication costs monthly are almost three hundred dollars and that is only for my husband and son, mine have not been possible for over 5yrs, this is a huge blessing! Thank you Trillium! As much as I miss the Ocean I am much happier about the positive changes, the growth I anticipate and eventually not living in the condition that had become an everyday acceptance in our lives....poverty, for now I am just stopping through on my way to something better. OH yes and I dealt with my feelings of missing the Ocean by bringing a 10L jug of sea water with me! when I am missing her terribly I mist some on my face and close my eyes and I am standing on the edge of the Atlantic all over again, my mother Yemaya always near holding me up.

That is where my life is right now, as I put it all back together I barely had everything out and ready for a Solstice Ritual this year but this I had to do, make wishes for me and you!

Here is my wish this Yule for all;

May poverty be eradicated in our lives and the lives of everyone else
May we all have all we need
May food never be something that we need to worry about again!
May your heat always work, your tanks be full and your hearts overjoyed with love!
As I so wish so Mote it Be!

Blessings from my family to yours!

Tess

My Cycle of Life, Death and Rebirth

"Memories light the corners of my mind
Misty water colored memories, of the Way we Were"
Barbara Streisand ~ The Way we Were

Memories are very private things, you can be in a room full of people during a large gathering and still in your mind be a million miles away reliving a moment that no one there is even a part of. I believe places hold memories and revisiting them triggers the re enactment of them in our hearts and minds, the full rage of emotions is free to take hold when that trigger goes off. I guess that for me that place is my little home town, even though I went to school in the big city of Toronto I grew up in the smallest of towns, a special breed of child, the one known as the cottager's kid, in a small town that never forgets that you are not a local. For me though there are some things about this town that I can never forget.

I came back to this town voluntarily, and the transition of being home has been interesting to say the least, there is a huge history here for me, quite a bit of it that is not the greatest of memories....In this town I lost everything I worked for due to illness, everyone that had been so wonderful when we had a thriving business turned their backs when we hit the rocks of poverty, everyone disappeared both familial and friends. This is the town that I was raped in, and the town that my rapist is buried in, it took me almost 3 decades to deal with that. This is the town that I held my father as he let his last breath go, although almost seven years ago now, still at the forefront of my painful memories. I am far from healthy here, my body breaks down and I struggle to deal with the past so it manifests in my physical life. How easy can it be to deal with the past when you face it each day, walk the same sidewalks and are forced to shop in the same stores. There is multitudes of pain here, memories that I can never erase and still I came back. 

To be clear I do not enjoy pain, but I am not good at running away either, when I left I was doing just that, cutting my losses, not facing my pain and just simply walking away from pain overload, it is now five years later, very unkind and difficult years by poverty standards. Who would ever think that poverty had standards but yes it does, some very stringent ones actually. Poverty has taught me much about who I am, who I was and who I want to be, something most people should learn at least once in their lives, but truthfully poverty is something that does not release its hold on you that easily. There are not many poor people that can boast a positive credit score, or have the resources to stretch that last dollar because sometimes that last dollar is actually just that the last dollar. The moment that one part of your foundation falls out from under you, which it does often with poverty the rest is like a house of cards it falls.....my poverty started here so I came back to face it, and face all the rest of them too. Of course being a minority, a witch and poor is a triple stack against me in this small town, anyone from a small town knows what that can be like. Every day I walk into the same areas I used to walk in before and still there are those that whisper, those that talk behind the scenes never having the courage to say to my face what they snicker about, still I hold my head up.....or try to. As our life unraveled here there was so much pain, hurt and anger.....everyday I deal with the consequences of the mental health issues that ran through our family, the losses that caused pain to rip people apart as I had to watch helpless as a mother and wife to help those I most loved, although no one really knew what was happening for us, the gossip train just rolled on with their versions and most times started by ex family members, people I helped who repaid me through their vicious lies to cover their own dirty hands. Everyday regardless of my own physical and mental health issues I get up and take care of everyone else, I deal with my pain quietly from even putting my foot on the floor, these are things that normally no one knows, but today finally after being here for a few months I feel the need to let it all out....maybe its the moon, or maybe its Samhain but either way this is only part of what I live with daily as I try to face my own demons, my memories.......it is hard shit doing this!

Everyday single day! I get up and I light my candle on my altar, everyday I chant to Yemaya, everyday I offer my love, faith and trust to her....everyday I ask for the strength to keep reclaiming my own life....this shit is hard to do, but I have faith that each day will make the next one easier.....at the end of each day I have my magic that gives me the strength to keep believing. 

May the Moon and Samhain bring us all what we need for this coming year....for me I finally let go of my pain on the last day of this five year cycle.....tomorrow I breathe fresh and step cleanly into our future.

Blessings

Tess

Perspective vs. Whispered Bullshit

Hi my name is Tess, some call me Teresa, others call me Mom, Avo, and even Bitch and StepBitch, yep I have many names......there are also just as many snide stories, comments and bullshit thoughts about me as there are real and genuine ones that come from relationships with me, people that went beyond what they thought they knew about me to actually get to know me and formulate a truthful opinion.  Today being my "bad" day in the healing process from the accidental prolonged exposure to gluten I guess the whole thing about the misconceptions has finally boiled over and I want to say a few things, so here goes!

1. I have an autoimmune disease and have had since I was in my late 20's and yes I was diagnosed with Fibro at 23, those wonderful brain fogs really get me, I miss my memories as sometimes they become jumbled and lost.....when digital cameras came along they became my best friends....they instantly preserve the memories for me so that I can look back and relive and remember sometimes important moments.....pictures fill in the holes in my own mind that chronic illness has taken.....so yes I share a lot of pictures and will for many more years to come, think of that next time you whisper.

2. I am pretty open about my life, my issues and what I may or may not have done but that does not mean that my family is up for discussion....I am like that mama Bear you might hear about protecting her young, except my young never get too old for me to do this, so tread very lightly when it comes to my family or you will meet the evil witch much sooner than you had hoped.

3. I have said this many times before but I guess I must say it again....even though I go by the name WiccanGodess ~ it is a LONG story ~ I am NOT Wiccan! I was when I started this walk into modern day witchcraft, but no I am NO longer a Wiccan.....I am a Witch plain and simple, I follow old ways that are more based on my own culture, both herbally and energetically......my path is one that is mixed with Brazilian/African culture and a somewhat Celtic slant that directly relates to my own heritage and its mixed history....I do not try to teach anyone, I answer questions when I can but because it is such a very personal path for me it is hard for others to grasp at times because I truly do things my own way....and yes that means I work with both sides of energy.

4. Yes I am an Artist, no this does not mean that I only create for the sake of creating and crafting, I wish I could but no I create because it helps me to support my family, as well as giving me a sense of freedom and purpose.....being disabled by disease and chronic conditions strips much of you away, battling it for almost 30 years now took parts of me that I thought I would never recover, until the wire, with every twist and turn I always feel my energy return....crafting saved my life on an internal and external level......crafting gives me hope.

5. Lastly! Judgement....have you heard me say before how much I hate judgment? there is always someone judging me, there is always something I am doing that is causing someone to get their knickers in a knot.....that bandwagon to jump on the judge, criticize, talk shit and smile to her face bandwagon seems to love to go around on a regular basis....sometimes I wonder if they ever stop to think that I know, of course I know....one of those gifts that I have carried my entire life is the gift of knowing, instantly seeing and hearing all of that.....sometimes not such a gift......let that shit go! or I promise you it will eat you up!

Perspective, there is mine and there is yours....sometimes when you don't know something your perspective is skewed.....try speaking to me, finding out what the scoop is instead of making up your mind based on half truths and someone else's whispered bullshit, I always give everyone one chance to ask questions.

and the block is gone!

Death, Change, Growth and Good Witches

This week has been one of those weeks that every day seems to stretch into an eternity, seeming like the week never ends but rather you are stuck in a time warp, over and over again something akin to the movie Groundhog Day, to say that I am glad, even extremely grateful to see the end of it would be an understatement. This week was surrounded with death, with reports in the media of a very unritualistic supposed Wiccan killing, the death of a television personality and ultimately one of our own landscape customers. Death was all around and visited close to home.....and if you are well acquainted with death then you know it will always make you think, go deep inside and visit those recess' of your heart and soul, couple that with the Blue Moon that was just last Friday and if you are an intuitive, empath or even slightly spiritual you will feel that you have been through the proverbial ringer....or at least I do.....

There were many emotions to process, when there is a life lost it is always a moment of sadness, some you find a way out of by feeling that at the very least they had a very good life and enjoyed it to the fullest although that is not really a comfort to the ones that are left missing them, or wishing that somehow they could turn back time to say all those things they thought they had tomorrow to say....tomorrow is never promised, say them today! I learnt this painful lesson when my father passed, I do my utmost to not leave things unsaid anymore.....so I told my mom I was sorry, for not stopping to see her as a woman before, for not being able to clear my eyes and see her reality before I lived it. That which you judge ye shall reap, yep and reap I did...I lived the crushing poverty, anyone that has been with me here on Witch's Chamber knows this, poverty to the point of putting food on the table to make sure they ate and you going without....the moments of sewing together clothes that the fibres have let go of simply because they have been worn through, so you learn to darn your clothes as if they were socks....I have lived through being a pariah and being treated like I was nothing, either because I am a witch, or the olive color of my skin or simply that I am different, not a complacent person, one that has a strong relationship with her husband and expresses her opinion because at the end of the day it is him and I against the world not him against me as parts of his family tried to make him believe.....amazing isn't it? I went to another province and lived her exact life, the hardships, the loneliness, the lack of connection with people that although there is nothing wrong with them you just cannot connect because you are from two different worlds, overall just a feeling of not belonging......I loved the place, I loved the Ocean and the ability to lay in Yemaya's waters, and I am thankful for those that tried real hard and made it through my protective shield, but I missed my own soil, never thought I would say that but I did.....I missed my own family, good or bad they get me.....although it was very hard to come back to this place where we lost it all, it was necessary to take back this part of our lives and do it right this time....one of the other things we experienced living through all that was also the great sense of family, the love and devotion we all have for each other even fractured right now with half here and half back there we still stand united, we have commitment, loyalty, strength and boundless love for each other....and for the rest of the world we have boundaries now, sealed in salt and dragons blood and a few other witchy things. Our personal visit from death this week finally made these words flow for me so here we go again, in an old place, a new beginning, this is scary shit! 

The more public visits by death made me quite upset, angry even at the ignorance of the sheriff in Pensacola, FL who felt the need to state things that he obviously knows nothing about! Stupid people say stupid things everyday but this well it was very irresponsible, in a time when moments of frenzy seem to take people over against one group or another for me means that people in authority should be more responsible with their words, the words uttered by that sheriff in total ignorance of what Wicca is or stands for are enough to cause witch hunts to break out.....people fear what they do not understand, and fear and ignorance make very dangerous bedfellows.......I know that elders in the community have done what they do and stood up and have attempted to clarify these things already so I am not writing this to hitch to their wagon, but simply because it really pissed me off......partially at our own community, how much bloody effort do we spend trying to discount each others paths? how much energy is spent with stupid ass witch wars? how much community is there these days that is not infected with ego, pride and my magic is better than yours? on the page I see it all the time, I delete and ban people for it! I have such a hard time wrapping my head around it really, for a community that purports to be about freedom of choice, finding your own path and all that jazz they sure do judge, snicker and put down anything that may not be part of their particular path.....before someone out there gets all freaky of course I am not saying everyone is like this but if you are honest you will admit that there is a strong number of them that are.....how do we ever expect anyone out there that isn't Pagan to understand if we as a community cannot even understand each other? Someone on my page asked me about a post, wondering what it had to do with being a witch, sad part is that yes the post did not mention or discuss witchcraft at all very true but the point it did go to was about being a good person and that was lost in their need to proclaim their path as the best and only way.....sad, angering, upsetting and well just a very clear example of what is being lost....us, you , me all of us we are getting lost in the fight to prove which way up the mountain we should all go....wake up! we cannot make the rest of the non Pagan world understand if we cannot find unity within ourselves! 

Broaden your perspective, try to listen to those around you, judge not, accept yes......this life is all you have to make a difference, all you have to make others see....now what would you like them to see? Be good people....makes being a witch so much better! 

Blessings all!

Lammas and The Blue Moon cometh....

As Lammas approaches I realize that I have bottled up words, feeling like they are churning and twisting so much to say, but the inability to let them just come.....that has been the challenge since moving here. A part of me feels so strongly that the reason is because if I say them then this dream will end, the reality will be we will still be living in the state of poverty we were in, this will have been all a dream that we resisted waking up from, but something inside me has changed forever so I can't ignore it any longer. Truth is I resist success, not just mine but as a whole within even my own relationships, I shy away from the limelight and when you are successful everyone sees you, they even seek you out, so I purposely do not allow myself to get right there to the point of no return, but rather shine for a bit and then let it dim slowly till almost out of sight only to start the whole cycle again without ever passing that threshold.

This is not a new concept to me but one that I struggle with every so often, always looking to find my way through it if even in a little tiny way, a glimmer of an extra step forward each time being what I strive for, sometimes I manage it sometimes not so much, either way the inner turmoil of it all makes me hide thereby negating all my efforts leading up to the threshold of success. So I am forced to delve back into my psyche and decipher why, where are my feelings of worth still lacking? where have I discounted my value in myself, what words are there that hang there like a curtain blocking my light? I have realized that for me words carry the most weight, bruises heal but words they continue to fester and infect all around them, years later when I feel I have grown beyond them they have a nasty way of coming back to bite me again, like that snake you didn't notice as you stepped down onto the grass, startled it lashes out, my heart lets loose with its deepest wounds.......this healing thing seems to be a life long process, with many layers to it because just when I think I have done it I find there actually is a much deeper layer I hadn't realized I had to sort through as well. A lifetime process it seems to keep healing, at times I wonder how many lifetimes and ancestral lines am I actually working on healing in this path? but I trudge on, this blog is today's step. Today I face my fear of success, and being thrust forward, and I admit it, I find for me the first step in healing and really growing beyond my comfort zone is to admit where my issues are. I hope this helps me to be able to let go enough to finally finish the book, where I have realized my issue lies in letting all see and read for themselves how I practice, how I deal and how I cope, I mean in all honesty what could be more personal than a book about me and by me? maybe that is why I agonize over its content, I share bits and pieces but hold back on letting it all be seen.....and yes that stems from my fear of rejection something that I have struggled with all my life, from playground to boardroom......in all aspects of all relationships, the rejections have been the hardest to come to grips with, very personal and core issues for me. At the root of it all I fear success because of the pain of rejection and ridicule.  Not very glamorous, but very human, witch or not I am still very human....

Now that I have delved into my heart again, I feel that this Lammas I shall give thanks and much gratitude for the wonderful and bountiful harvest we have been given, a roof over our heads, food on the table and a wonderful home to live in, all we ever wished for really has been granted, and we are working on the financial security to a certain degree, or as much as you can when working for yourselves. There really is so so much to be thankful for, when poverty was not so long ago, when it was a stretch to make the meals last and the constant pleas to utility companies was enough to crush my spirit, it really was only 3 months ago....part of me wonders if the newness of it all is not also contributing to my trepidation about how solid it all is.....maybe I have to let it sink in that the drought is really over......and this, all of this is what I choose to lay down in front of the Gods for this Full Blue Moon, the moment of final balancing for me and the wish to finally pass that threshold that eludes me of success, at least what I consider to be success. 

Have you thought of what you will be thankful for this Lammas? or what you wish to work with for this amazing Moon that comes on Friday? if you haven't it might be a great opportunity to work with your own core and see where you can use the help of this amazing energy, or at the very least celebrate the energy of harvest and gratitude with those you love, you won't regret it......this is all for me now, onto swimming in the river and letting the waters run over my body as it washes away the fears and prepares me for the growth I seek.

Blessings and love to you all! 

Diffusing the Hate, it starts with you!

Every so often I sit back and watch the world revolve around me, it is an amazing thing to do to be like the vultures and allow yourself to ride the currents of life, but every so often a frenzy will whip up in the winds around me and I have no choice but to speak up and today there are a couple of things I need to clear up it seems.

First! NO ETSY IS NOT DISCRIMINATING AND REMOVING MAGICAL SHOPS or WITCH RELATED SHOPS! I am so sick and tired of seeing these damn headlines that are perpetuating a lie and at the same time whipping up everyone into this needless frenzy of anger about being discriminated against, this really is not the case.  The truth of this situation is that when we chose to be sellers on Etsy we agreed to their Terms of Service, much like any site that you get on in order to use it you must agree to their terms, after all you are using their site not your own, on top of that first thing there is the much more important thing than just choosing a site, there is the law of your own land, wherever you may live has it's own laws, familiarize yourself with them because breaking these ones come with bigger consequences than just having your shop taken down.  Now how you might ask how do I know that the big bad mean Etsy is NOT discriminating, well it is very simple I make no secret of my life path, my shop is named Witch's Chamber and yes I have tarot readings and spell kits on offer there.....and when all this started and I began hearing the rumblings of this I was at first worried, but I felt that I should do nothing, then about two weeks ago I received an email from an Etsy admin, letting me know that they had moved my two metaphysical services to their new heading, that's right not telling me that they were removing my shop, or the listings no they weren't doing that, they were simply moving them because like I was told in the letter my descriptions of my services did NOT contravene their Terms of Use nor did they go against the law of the country I live in.  I really struggle with these situations when everyone seems to be jumping on the hate Etsy bandwagon, I am by no means a part of the administration there but fair is fair, there are many other reasons to complain about Etsy but to do it based on an outright lie well then that is just horrible! at least in this witch's humble opinion! Besides if you walk this path be honest with yourself how many times have you looked at the ads and listings that promise burn this candle and you will lose 30lbs, or check out this haunted gypsy witch pendant buy it and wear it and you will win the lottery how many times have you seen these ads and shook your head and realized that these types of wording give an inacurate definition of what it is to cast a spell or work magic? let's be honest most of us distance ourselves from these things so why act like it isn't so? not to mention the ever so simple statement of why oh why! would you accept terms of service, then go about breaking them and then be upset when your shop is gone? I simply cannot wrap my head around this one! seems utterly stupid. The cone of anger over it needs to stop, the raising of energy that is whipping into this engine under its own steam needs to stop, it is completely unjust.

Next! my page; no hell my whole existence is about Witch's Chamber, not just the Facebook page but the whole idea of it, the living breathing soul of me that I put out there daily; I live and breathe my magic each day, I simply don't even know how to live any other way without living and breathing my magic, any other way is simply completely unauthentic for me.......so on my page, I share all manner of things, some pique my interest others I find amusing and some things I love and others I don't but find value in sharing them as someone out there might have need of it or enjoy it or even find some sort of comfort in it. I am saying all this today because I have never had to ban so many people like this last weekend, the traces of racism, homophobia and just down right inappropriate and rude comments were just unbelievable. I fully understand and appreciate everyone's right to their own religion but in truth if you are a radical Christian why would you want to be on my page?  I mean I know there are many on my page that are Christian and I have no issue with that and I am not here to bash Christianity at all, after all my husband and a few of my kids are Christian and we all co exist in the family circle quite well and discuss our beliefs openly so please before you bash me for saying this be sure of what you are doing, the truth is it just boggles my mind when comments are made about how my posts offend you, being that the page and I are very clear about what it is and what it represents and yet you still find offence? well then in truth you do not belong on the page, plain and simple truth, whether you be Christian, Pagan or whatever else there is, there is no room on my page for bigots, racists or religious zealots ~ the Urban Dictionary version! ~ there is no room at this Inn! so keep on walking or scrolling as the case may be!

Now I know that for these two moments of clearing the air and expressing my truths I will have pissed someone off, made someone feel slighted or called them out or whatever else is the fashionable term of the day for offending someone by speaking the truth, well so be it, people really need to start acting like adults and living and breathing their truth not hiding behind lies, hate and ignorance....

EDUCATE yourself and others! INSPIRE change, love, growth and acceptance NOT HATE! we really are all one!

Blessings and Gratitude, Love and Growth comes to Witchs Chamber

I can't believe how long it has been since I have written! Each day I meant to sit and write but in truth there was so much activity so much going on that while my mind kept jotting it down wanting to parlay it to my fingers there was just no time to sit and do it, and if there was then I was not finding it! From the moment we decided this was what we wanted; to come back to this place and reclaim the remanents of our old life here, our lives took up a lightening speed kinda of track....I know to a certain extent I feel that I have been propelled forward as if on some amazing amusement park ride that comes complete with the materialization of your dreams.....this year has been that big! and ripe with changes for us...geographical ones, family ones and even as trivial as it may sound to some the jumping ship from Chevy to Dodge, which was huge for my old guy! This has truly been a time of magic, wonder and amazing amounts of love; both shared and received. I have many reasons to be thankful and grateful to the Gods, the Ancestors, the Orishas and all of you that have walked along this very bumpy and sometimes dark road, without you all I would not be here, I would not be writing this and I most certainly would not feel as blessed in this life as I do. Thank you! Now let me fill you in on it all!

First yes the great moment of Chevy not being the chosen one for us anymore, this was a heated and quite often upsetting debate in our home. He of course loved his Chevy and swore off anything Dodge related and me well I loves me a good ol Dodge! For as many years as we have been together we have debated this, until this year....when it came time to find a mini van, our Chevy's 2nd engine having died again last year, this year our grandbaby was coming so we had to find something suitable to make the trek back here, her birth being the catalyst to all these changes actually! so we searched only to read horrible reviews on every Chevy we found available, but Dodge Caravan well that was a whole other deal, so he began to think maybe this was a definite and viable option for us and then low and behold the perfect Dodge just seemed to show up, the former owners were so very agreeable to work with and she became our Blue Thunder and now a couple of months later I am happy to say that my old guy is a converted Dodge lover! quite a bit of magic there! and this does not even touch on the magic that was alive in the funding of this vehicle! when it seemed most hopeless the amount of love and support from all of you in sharing my links and my shop generated such an amazing stream of income that the purchase came together in less than a month! I am so very blessed! that one purchase changed our life!

When we arrived back here, ready to stay with our daughter and son in law, we knew it would be for a while, we hoped it would be for a long while, we never expected that it would be the beginning of our move back here, well let's say I don't think my old guy expected it, me I had a few little messages about the way things would go here, but! as they started to unfold let me just say even for me the level of energy, magic, blessings and overall abundance that would suddenly flow our way well....it truly knocked me on my ass! we came back hoping that we could find a viable option for work for the old guy, within 24hs there were offers on the table, there were customers wanting services from cleanup to interior work.....just what he wanted, exactly as he asked the Gods for there it was....then a home that materialized and is perfect for our family, it just manifested before our eyes the likes of which we never thought we would have AND now she is ours....working on furnishing it and the logistics of getting everyone here and under the same roof, and moving what we have across country, tricky situations but it will work itself out I am sure of it! and well Witch's Chamber has taken a bit of a hit due to all this going on and my inability to settle yet, I hope this now will change! On one deck here I can watch the sunrise and on the other watch the beautiful sunsets....again! blessed by the Gods, ever so grateful for this amazing gift of shelter. We are so very blessed!

Then the most amazing of the blessings came to be! on Saturday we all settled in under our new roof, the first time I have had my husband and I with two of our girls under the same roof in about 5 years now, since the move to New Brunswick, it was the perfect day for it the weekend of Mother's day we were all going to have dinner, followed by a lovely pancake brunch on the morning of Mother's day, well! didn't our little Josephine have a different plan! She definitely thought it was the perfect day to grace her mummy with her presence and of course her grand mummy! me! It was a difficult and hard labour with complications at the end, my beautiful baby girl has never liked to do anything easily and this was no different! but I am very happy to say that both Nicole ~ my baby ~ and Josephine ~ her baby~ are both doing well now! and once again Nicole has taught me even more about life, relationships and the level of love that I carry for my little miracle baby, thank you for making me a grandmother! Jo is named after my father, and already I know I feel him dancing for joy because he just loved when little girls were born, he was the one Portuguese man that I knew that never said he preferred sons to daughters, never once and when he heard it was a girl he celebrated it because he believed they were so very special.....I know this pleased him....and little Jo has already taught us that we would much rather be here, I cannot imagine being 18 hrs away when she popped into this world, I cannot imagine not being there for her mummy.....our family can no longer be fractured and in that moment whatever amount of doubt that was left about is this the right decision for our family well it was squashed, forever ground under our feet....we are all stepping together forward, heads held high, we know this is the right move for us all so Ontario you are home again.

Change is growth, change is good....growth is essential, stagnation is not an option.....breathe and trust in the directions of the Gods, the Ancestors and the Orishas.....breathe keep stepping, that is the new mantra for our family, just believe and keep stepping! Now the old guy is starting his own little business, working towards building a customer base that will help us support us through the winter and help us to keep the roof over our heads and food on the table, lots of good energy would be appreciated for his continued growth and abundance, this is so very important to him and to our family! Thank you all!

Phew! so can you imagine that this has all transpired since mid March to now! can you imagine what it is like to have your whole life change in such a small span! my head was spinning and there were just too many words! and oh so so much gratitude! it overwhelmed me and made me drop to my knees literally and kiss the Earth, thanking my mother Yemaya and my Goddess Hecate, sending loving gratitude to all the Gods that played a part in bringing all these abundances in every way into our life! the blessings from our Ancestors are overflowing and abundant! Thanks be to all! and to all of you I send Blessings of love, abundance, smiles and healing!!

<3

OOOPS they did it AGAIN!

Well things had been going so well, so very well that a part of me really thought this form of attack on me and my page was over, the malicious little clicks that know they are simply doing it out of some green living and thriving envy that they have of me, my wire and all I am trying to do with my life, but NO! Ooops they did it again! Every time the page grows, it crosses certain newsfeeds that just simply cannot stand to see the growth, the happiness and joy that I found in my life since leaving theirs; yes that is right as I laid my head down to sleep last night I was dinged out of it when my phone let me know there was a new post on Witch's Chamber and when I read it I was so very upset that for hours I sat up with the old guy discussing this....why me? why what I create? is it somehow offensive? is it them? after a few hours of back and forth discussion, and I swear sometimes you just absolutely have to have the clarity that a Scorpion brings to the table especially for my swinging madly out of control Libra scales! and yes the conclusion drawn by the old guy? it is them.....my page discusses me, my work, my creations, my shop and my blog; there is no logical reason that when it shares anything within that realm that it should be considered spam unless of course your issue is with me....that is not something unheard of, hell I know a ton of people that don't like me, just like I know who is doing this and I KNOW they don't like me, I am completely OK with that! but I do find it to be a sad thing when a witch's ego gets ahead of her ability to do what is right and live in such a way as to not hurt others maliciously, her and her little clan of flying monkeys....well no matter how positive and uplifted I am let us never forget I am also human and can have the fleeting sarcastic and not so NICE thoughts about them, it is not in having those thoughts of what I would like to send them, do to them or asks the Gods to do that marks me as a bad witch or person, it is what I choose to do with them that dictates who I am....so what did I decide to do? I went to sleep!

As I woke up this morning from the most restful sleep I have had in some time! the thought was there, I was going to go to my altar and ask for healing.....their healing. Somewhere in my dreams last night I sat alongside the chair of my Goddess and listened to her words, she was very clear; only those that are truly lost and trapped within their own pain can maliciously create so much havoc in the lives of others, on an emotional, spiritual, mental and financial level, make no mistake they wish for my failure not my success......for me the page is not just a Facebook account, it is my expression of all I am, my path, my chosen words, my creations and all I try to share with you all ~ their actions create much havoc! A part of me feels sad for them, I did at one time get to see glimpses of who they used to be before walking away, sadly it seems all this time has done nothing to stop their venom from growing within them, as Goddess told me it is time to send healing that way. It is time to answer the virtual door they keep knocking on with a mountain of love, healing, support and even MORE love! It is only in them finding their peace within themselves that they will leave me alone, that they will learn to focus on their own crafts, their own skills and their own paths to lead them out of the misery that keeps boomeranging back into their lives, I learned this lesson long ago and do not wish to go back. I choose good, I choose strength, faith, love and I choose to create an #AvalancheofGood in my life and those lives that I come into contact with, I choose to remain true to my Gods.

                                           Instead of anger and destruction I send healing.

All of these things had already transpired today by the time I posted a little sentence asking you all what you wanted for today on the page, just imagine the feeling of synchronicity when the majority of you requested the healing circle! I knew Goddess had been reaching to your hearts too, together we can stand virtually and extend hands, we can send the love, healing and support we all need....we send nothing but positivity and strength, a genuine hand up to our brothers and sisters, may your hearts feel peace and an eternal Divine connection! My sincere wish is that all will find peace within their own soul.

Come join us on the page and share your energy with us! and remember no matter what others may throw at you, your reaction and counteraction is all within YOUR control, so act accordingly with your Gods.

Blessings!

Letters, tears and finally Peace

Today a letter to my dad, you see today is six years from the day the world lost a true hero, well at least in my eyes.....they are no longer the eyes of a child that sees her father as a prince, a king or even someone without his own faults, but the eyes of a woman that now understands life from a whole other perspective, and I realize the whole thing about staying positive; yea he started that with me....no matter how hard his lesson was, how difficult what came his was there was never any quit in him, and he smiled and carried on always putting everyone else ahead of himself.....yea he was my hero...... When today dawned I had the usual moments of tears, pain in my heart and missing him even more, then the inevitable as I saw it all again in my mind, this day, his passing and how I watched the life slip from him in my arms and he fought it so strongly......and yes I fell apart, trying to decide what or how I could regain my composure, find my way back to the positive side of the road I am on.....I realized what I miss the most is being able to talk to him and tell him what I am doing, on a spiritual level and in all I believe I know he stays with me and sees all I do, but on a very human level that does not comfort the missing moments for me, so here goes........

Hi Pai, 

Here we are again today, that awful day we all lost you....I know I know you are here anyway but some times it becomes hard to feel you so I have these moments....so many things have changed here since you have been gone

I realized a while ago that when you passed I got lost in this endless cycle of anger, loss and grief and it well it didn't exactly manifest in the best ways, I am really sorry that I let you down on those things that we both know you wanted me to do, I could not quiet my mind long enough to work on the feelings and their impact on all our lives......I can honestly tell you and you are welcome to look in that heart of mine and see that I am FINALLY in a better place, I can cope now, grow and continue to go along this jaded path of mine. I found my love of wire and creation in all this time, and many of the copper pieces I create is still with that roll of wire you gave us, makes me feel like you are still here, somehow still helping and caring for us all.....I know that was your life's whole purpose, not because you felt obligated but it was how you showed love, guess what I know now that is what I do to, you taught me well, although I am not as good at it as you are, right now I still struggle and have to claw for each bit that I do manage to make but it gets better everyday, and now I know what you meant by going to bed with a question and waking up with the answers, that is how it works for me many times. 

In May your first great-grandbaby will be here! even though the proud parents have resisted finding out the sex of the babe I am so sure that it's a boy I feel growing inside Nicoley, I can't wait to see if the golden eyes skipped a generation! I still have a bunch of the baby things you got me when I had her and I am planning to take them to her, soon as we have a vehicle, hint hint maybe you could give us a little lucky nudge in that respect, help me reach our goal.....maybe from up there you can make some really famous person fall in love with my work so they come forward wanting some amazing commission....hehe I can always hope! I remember many times how you taught me to drive, it was probably the best lesson of my life; remember you told me look straight ahead and line up my eyes with the horizon; that is where you are going, remember that! so I keep my eyes on the horizon and keep striving forward, no matter what I will get where I am going.....

Pai, I lost my way for a while but now I am strong again, my heart and mind are aligned and I am ready, thanks for always being there and guiding me gently and I know saving me from falling apart completely MANY times.....thank you for always being you and for shining that love on me still today, as I sit here and write this I can stare into your beautiful golden eyes looking back at me in that spiffy tuxedo you hated, lol, still some of the happiest pictures of just you and me......

I love you, yesterday, today, tomorrow and always......

oh yes and YES as much as you hated it I still wear all black....it is just what I do, but inside your love paints my heart with colors all alive and brilliant

T.


Blessings all thank you for being a part of my way forward and my circle....much love to you all.....this for me was hard but worth it, and it brought me peace to share.....it was my way to keep on my path of the #AvalancheofGood

keep on striving where you are too and turn your pain into growth, your tears into joy, enjoy the moments of your life, they will only come around once.

Relationships, have you figured out the MOST Important one yet?

Relationships, now that is a loaded word.....when you say it everyone always thinks of love relationships, spousal or partner relationships, I sometimes wonder how many stop to consider that we are in constant relationship with everything and everyone we meet....that's right every interaction is a form of relationship.....one of the definitions of the word itself is ~ the way in which two or more people or organizations regard and behave toward each other ~ found on Google. so everyday when you deal with people you are in a form of relationship, how you regard them and choose to actually interact with them that is all up to you....yes you.....then there is the even more important relationship, the one I hope you understand after this blog that does not actually involve two people.....but first things first, change your ideas about the word relationship.....

How many people do you know that spent years and years preparing for their career and life's ambition, they took enormous amounts of time to learn what they needed to know to do what they chose for themselves, true right? Understandable right? yup! Now that same person now gets a job in their chosen career, wonderful! now they must learn the inner policies of that position, what is acceptable and what is not, what is expected and what is not, this all seems about right and very fair.....and we invest years honing our trade, gaining experience and understanding about what we do, what we love and many times a huge part of who we are, and maybe someday you realize that you have been in relationship with that part of your life for years, with your job yes, with your passions yes, with those people at work yes, even with the ones that you aren't quite keen on yes you have been in relationship with them....and where it did not work you learnt to change your inner wiring to accommodate the needs of that relationship, as much as you could without compromising who you are on an inner level, so you accepted that to work together with others positively and promote a team connection that you needed to make compromises that work for all concerned, we all agree that is an ideal work environment, an ideal working relationship....do you not agree with this? have you not experienced it in your own life? take a moment then to wonder why we will give so much of our time and energy to this aspect of relationship but we have less time and much less of an air of compromise in our more intimate relationships......there we seem to more inflexible and unwilling to flow with sometimes needed changes and adjustments....why is that?

Does it not strike anyone else that we have all had our minds changed to value things in a much different way than we should have been? For example, I have an amazing relationship with my wire, I have not been trained to do it but the wire bends under my fingers with little effort, one tool and one cutter is all I use and I attribute this all to my relationship with the Gods and I can say it was not until I changed the value system in my heart that the relationship of my dreams found me. One day I just woke up, I wish I could be clear on when it happened, when I woke up and just knew my heart was clear, that somehow I had found the healing I needed, but I can't all I can tell you is that the advice I give is because I have lived it, the words I share are the ones that I feel as I look back....they are the words I share with my children before I share them with you. Somewhere along the way our wiring got totally screwed, the feminists will blame the males, the males will blame the females, the Christians will blame Pagans and vice versa...and the blame shift can go on and on....for me I think we all just need to accept we are here, in this fucked up state of existence when what you do is more important than who you are inside, hell so many don't even have a clue as to who they are and even sadder is the fact that they don't care to find out. My point is there is plenty of time to analyze it all after the fact but right now let's get our asses in gear and change our victimhood wiring that is so prevalent in all of us.....we are victims of everything in life, this is somehow where we have ended up, and I know by saying this I am going to get someones knickers in a knot but damn it is the truth, and the only way out is to face it in our lives where we are subconcsiously accepting this wiring as truth.....where ever that may be! be honest with yourself, you do not need to be honest with anyone else, but please be honest with yourself; then! well then! get up and change that wiring, do it every morning before your feet touch the floor, tell yourself that you are in control of your life, you can invite good, positive and inspiring energy into your life......YES YOU CAN! truth is no one else can do it for you....I can write blog after blog about this, I can post meme after meme on Witch's Chamber till I am literally blue in the fingers, and it will not change one iota for you, unless you choose to change your wiring yourself, recognizing it is the first step......it won't be easy but it is YOUR mind is it not about time you control how it process' the events around you? your mind is powerful beyond belief, all you really need to do is decide that you want to have a better relationship with YOU, with YOUR mind, YOUR life......how about if we were all to put some of that dedication we put into our careers and jobs into ourselves? into our relationship with our own inner core?

Of course I am not by any means a psychology guru, counsellor or physician of any sort; I am simply an old witch  with six children and have spent a lifetime listening and helping where I could with those that had lost their own way, all the while finding my own path materialising under my feet.....some will not agree with these thoughts and that is fine, one thing I have realized along the way is that no one will change their wiring until they are good and ready, I am fully ok with that! What is right for me is not always right for everyone else and I expect that but for even maybe the 1% out there that this can help well I will continue to post and share my story.....every once in a while someone shoots me a message and reaffirms that they found some comfort in the words, and that it helped them find their way on their own journey in this life and me well, if you know me then you know that makes me smile deep down to the heart.

So remember! wake up each day and thank the Gods, thank YOUR Goddess, the Universe or whatever you believe in, find something to be grateful for, most of all remember to be happy to be you....send some good, feel some good and THEN get up and let the rest of the world in. Invest some time being in relationship with yourself, there is no more rewarding love than the love that you shower on yourself, think of all those people you love and how happy it makes them when you show them love? what makes you think you do not deserve that in your own life? now that's right go about loving yourself!

I send you good thoughts, love and support in this next step of the #AvalancheofGood

Change your Perspective, Change your Life #AvalancheofGood

Everyday I get up and send out good thoughts, every single day regardless of what is going on in my life and there is tons that goes on! Every day I hear many responses to what I send out and today I think it is time to let you all know what actually does go on in my life, not because I am looking for sympathy of any kind but because sometimes in this very busy human life of ours I think we lose perspective on the fact that EVERYONE has crap that goes on that makes life difficult for them....but changing how you approach it is a choice, it really is and before I realized that I struggled under years and years of worry, depression, feelings of inadequacy and well searching continually for something that would alleviate the state of my mind and the constant noise that would not let me sleep. This is a part of my story and part of what would have gone into the book that I have been writing for as many years as I could spell I guess, but now here we are and I think it is more beneficial to rip that band aid right off long before The Cracked Cauldron is ever released......

When I tell you that you should get up each morning and think a Good thought even before you get out of bed I tell you this because that is how I found my way out of that darkness of my soul, I never say try; I always say DO! the moment you say try you have already accepted failing.....inherent in the word try is the acceptance of failure as an end result, DON'T try! DO!! get up each morning and do it, each day it will get easier and the negativeness will quiet down over time. Next when I say DO NOT judge! I say this not because I do not know the consequences of judgement, I mean hello! look at my life! of course I judged, I did it, I admit it....I judged because I was stuck in this awful place where I could not look at my own life, yes because of the state of it, yes because it was easier to pass judgement on others that hurt me rather than to face them, discuss it or even try to mend it. I have learnt the hard way that judgement does nothing but bring you the life that you stand high and mighty over.....never thought I would so understand the life my mother led to get her to the place where she ended up emotionally, but yet here I am living that same life, feeling the same about the people in my life that are parallelled to hers, so I get up everyday and thank the Gods that I can see clearly and I send out good thoughts. My twenty-one year old son gets up everyday knowing that he has a brain tumour and will require injections for the rest of his life to simply try to lead a somewhat physically normal life but he keeps going, he finds artful and practical ways to cope with the disabilities this leaves him with, he doesn't complain or give up, and he sends out good everyday. My husband and daughter cope with varying degrees of mental health issues with grace, dignity and hold their heads up even when they have bad days they still keep going and try to help where they can, and me well we all know my physical health is just a bad joke, I cope and keep going; so you see every single day in our household we deal with disease, mental illness and other aspects of life that attempt to break our spirit...not mention the poverty, lack and constant struggle to keep food on the table, the lights on and the heat going.....that never ends. We never try in our household we DO because we have no choice, each one of us relies on the other to keep us going emotionally and mentally, and it is with that support and heart that I send out what I do everyday to all of you. Like me there is a ton more out there, all you have to do is look through the responses to yesterday's circle call on Witch's Chamber what we all live through is hard shit, posts like those give us a place to lean on each other, we find comfort in community, reaching out and in giving support it lifts us up out of our own and little by little opens our eyes to see that others are also going through it, and to each of us our own lives always appear to be the worst......but a shared burden allows it to ride on more shoulders, thereby lightening our own load.

All this being said I realize it is hard to do this, to change the way you look at the world; to change how you perceive that around you is probably one of the hardest things you can do in life. It will not happen in a day, it will not happen in a week, hell it could take years for you to finally sit down and suddenly realize that HOLY CRAP the way I look at things is so different than it used to be! but notice I said realize, because the truth is the moment you start getting up each morning and taking that moment before you even get up to think good thoughts, send good thoughts and let even just the light of the Sun fill you with warmth you have just created a lasting change in your own life. Imagine that you were going to this place that you loved going to as a child for me it would have been the Canadian National Exhibition or CNE in downtown Toronto, each year as it would open I would be ever so excited to go there, even though I had been every year, knew all the rides I still loved going....normally the night before we were going I would not even sleep! that anticipation, excitement and just happiness at seeing the Sun shine in my window that morning is now what I feel each day when I get up and the Sun is shining at me, reminding me that I made it another day, another wonderful day to make a difference in my life and the life of those that I come in contact with....each moment is a chance to begin again and start to feel the good that comes into life, take pleasures in the simple things and let them guide you back to those feelings.....when it is too hard to do on your own then reach out, to friends, family, me.....just reach out, our only way through the mess the world is in is to help each other up, so be one that helps or if need be reach out and let someone else help you up.....the day will come when you will be in a place to pay it forward and help another do the same.

I challenge you all to Change your PERSPECTIVE and Change your LIFE.

Today I sit here and send you all love and support, I send good thoughts that those that feel in the dark find their light, that those that feel alone find community, and that all that you feel you lack comes to find you, by the Gods I will it so. Everyday I send good, everyday I add to the #AvalancheofGood and everyday I have faith that it will grow and encompass all that need the good feelings, love and hope that collectively we send out! 

Healing Circle ~ #AvalancheofGood

As I sit today to have my breakfast I am a little more elevated, buoyant and I guess happier. Today we are having a Healing & Prayer circle on Witch's Chamber  sending the love and the energy to all that need it and want it today, won't you all come and join us? another step in our #AvalancheofGood

it may not seem like much to take the moment and join this little movement, but each one, each bit of energy or love that goes out into the world has the ability to change and modify that which we live in....is it not worth the effort to affect lasting change in the world around you? 

Blessings all! sending much love, healing and support to all of you out there! 

Start an Avalanche of Good Energy

This morning I got up well rested and in quite a good mood, I felt wonderful! then I sat down at my computer, and the onslaught of negative started. Have you ever had one of those moments? you wake up well and happy but then as you start your day you realize that the world around you has become this very harsh and negative place, everyday we are bombarded with negative, angry, bordering on hateful media, when it is not angry it is sexual, sex is literally everywhere....don't get me wrong I have NO issue with sex but really does it have to be involved in everything? like really do you think people believe that if you buy that particular beer that the bikini clad nymph will suddenly land in your lap or that this type of underwear has the ability to get you laid just wear you will see! like seriously! shake my damn head!

So I sat with my coffee and had a good long think about this, of course there was nothing I found in that think that changed the way I felt about things, it is pretty depressing when you actually stop to think of the state of society, when you let yourself feel the agonies of those that cry out silently, the damage that we are subjected to and the way that all this misinformation and misrepresentation of us as humans is creating an inhospitable environment for us and WE are doing it to ourselves! willingly, and that was the saddest of all the realizations today......and that is why I decided I have to do something to stop it, at least in my own corner of the world, so I reached out to the Gods and it hit me like a shot......all of a sudden the phrase Start an Avalanche of Good Energy......whispered ever so gently into my heart so here I am doing just that!

Let us all gather together no matter where you are today; take a moment, think a good thought, when the negative thought creeps in STOP yourself and replace it with a POSITIVE one.....TRY it! it will not be easy at first but I promise you start with one moment and go from there, each time you do it it WILL get easier! We can do this together......START AN AVALANCHE OF GOOD ENERGY.....think that thought each day, send that energy when you first rise, think of the person that you know needs the positive in their lives, think of yourself and how beneficial it is to your own life and send that out to others, spread that shit far and wide! I honestly believe we have the power to change our world, our environment and to affect lasting change to the rest of the world around us BUT we cannot do that alone, we need to be there for each other. You may wonder what good can it really do? energy is fluid, it permeates, it flows and it creeps in where you least expect it all you have to do is agree to allow it access, you already do that everyday by watching your television, listening to your radios or even just sitting reading your newspapers, you give it complete permission to invade you, now I ask you to give the same agreement to GOOD energy. As it grows then reach out and pay it forward to someone that you see struggling with the same burden of negativity.....reach out to your brothers and sisters, help them up.....there is no greater measure of a human soul than the amount of times that they bent down to give a hand to a kindred.

Think about this my witchies.....it is ever so important to my soul, and was a message I had to deliver today as the Gods would have it no other way.

Blessings!

#AvalancheofGood

Healer, take your own damn advice!

I am a witch, I was born one, as much as that may annoy some out there that disbelieve that can be true, or may suddenly ask me for some sort of verification on this subject, some degree or some other piece of paper that states what I am, truth is I have never needed anyone to believe, assert or reaffirm for me what I have always known.....I AM a witch and I was BORN a witch. I fought it for many years and I resisted the signs and signals from the other side, the dreams and visits from ancestors that I had never met in life, but that got me nowhere so about 26 years ago I jumped right out there and let the world know ~ well my family and those around me ~ that I needed to follow my path and I became a tarot card reader for a certain shop on the Lakeshore in Mississauga, Ontario, Canada. I loved it and never looked back after that. This path has been a long one, it has also been a painful and rewarding one all in the same breath.....I have lost many along the way, that either judged or were afraid of what this meant, I think of them at times, miss them even but when I think back to who I was with them and who I am now, I know I could never have gotten here if I had stayed there. So I keep walking forward, life has been hard at times, at others wonderful and really such is life, not to sound so cliche but it is the truth, it is all a cycle, what goes up must come down and so on and so forth, I am sure we all know that by now.......

It seems these days though that all I find when I log into my profile and check my wall is a constant complaint about how this witch is doing this, or that one is doing that, and how dare they think they know what they are doing and I shake my head.....what has happened to these people that they always feel the need to judge, comment and spread such utter negativity about each other? it is really a sad thing in my eyes and so destroys any hope at magic you think you might have. I walk this path alone by choice ~ and really not totally alone, I do have a mentor, someone I look up to, I just don't publicize ~ you see I did the whole events, rituals, and public thing, for quite some time. I was at one time very sought after in Mississauga for readings and Spiritual Counseling, one particular Summer Solstice we had a wonderful circle going, but the line for services with me was so long and the souls were needing encouragement something that my empathic heart could hear loud and clear so the other practitioner that had come in from the Niagara region led the circle, it was a great night.....one I remember often, but like anything else sometimes things have to change and eventually some went on with their lives in different directions and I moved almost two hours away, and I think when I did I left a piece of my Pagan heart on the Lakeshore. It has never been the same for me with any other groups, organizations or rituals, I have been yes, no I didn't enjoy it and all except for one party I left early feeling disconnected....and this is the reason I am solitary, well to a certain degree, I do love our shared rituals and energy work, prayer calls and healing rituals we do on Witch's Chamber, I will always do those, but I dare say unless I trust you implicitly odds are I will not attend rituals or any other type of energy work, nothing personal but I have experienced and seen with my own eyes what energy can do and I can honestly say the few have spoiled it for the many.....just because this is how I feel personally though does not mean I would judge, ostracize or criticize those that go their way, we all practice how we feel called, that is what I firmly believe......I would hazard to guess that like me there are many many more of you out there with similar experiences and reasons for your solitary path.....so how does all this realization affect my life well I live in my truth everyday, good, bad, ugly or distasteful it is my life and what I have created, boy can you imagine how exciting it is to realize all that??? 

Now that I know I created this life, I am wanting to create one that I am much happier with ~ yes there are some that are ACTIVELY campaigning for me to never achieve this~ but as I did a reading last night for someone it became abundantly clear to me that it was high time I take my own advice, as I told her to write out what she needs and let the Gods know it struck me it was time I did the same.....I need a home that can accommodate my family, one that is warm, safe and large enough to give me a craft room......I need a vehicle because I have commitments I need to honor and I cannot do that without one,..... I need to be able to provide for my family and to find ways to reach heights in my art that I never even dreamed were possible, the wire heals my heart.....and I need to go home, I need to be closer to the people that I do feel connection with, only 2 hours away is much better than 18 hours away, and for that to happen I need to be able to take my family with me....these are the things I need in my life, these are the things I lay at the feet of the Gods and ask for guidance, help, support, protection ~ yes sadly enough, since I intimidate some by my lack of wanting to be a "groupie" I am the target of their attacks ~ so yes I need the protection of the Gods because unlike many I am not a stupid witch and do not count myself as higher than those I serve, it takes some huge ego to do that and any witch worth her salt knows that there is no room for ego in magic. It is time for me to recreate my life, take all the good that is here and I am grateful for and expand and grow with it, for all these things I call on the Gods, to cause no harm nor return on me, As I so Wish so Mote it Be

What do you need to recreate in your life? have you tried to write your requests, needs and words to your Gods? you might be surprised with the response, when you live in your own truth, walk it everyday and take the leaps with faith in those you serve then there is no magic that is too much, there is no moment that is terrifying because you instinctually know the Gods, they have your back. 

Blessings all! I hope today you find what you need, or at the very least you start stepping in the direction that will take you to it! 

About them bad behaviors

Maybe I have been silent too long, maybe I have just let things build up but right now I just cannot let it go anymore, I guess the inner bitch or witch or both have finally had enough and here goes!

I know we all wish we could always only deal with positive and love and light but it just does not happen that way.....let's see just this week in my own life there have been glaring examples of this, as much as I send positivity, love and spend my time with my altars, candles, incense the Fae and the Gods there are still moments where it just cannot be positive, you just simply have to deal with the negative and no amount of glitter or light thrown at it will change that. It is simply a sad truth that we must deal with as humans.

This week for me was a glaring moment of wow, not a good wow moment but a horribly disappointing one, that then lead to feelings of anger eventually at the very clear reality that no matter what I do I will forever have to battle for each step forward. No matter what circles I may move in, no matter how much I give there will always be someone that is not happy about my growth, slightly jealous I guess; although of what I have not quite figured out, but yet they must be in order to go to my fan page on Facebook and report MY status as spam.....let me be totally clear here, my page, my status and yet somehow me posting it made it spam.......yes and they did not do this just once no over a period of 3 days they reported 6 different posts, and followed posts to other pages and reported theirs too......not ugly, vulgar or any other type of maybe offensive posts, just regular posts, just because they felt like being malicious, just because they could and by doing so they created havoc for me and my page, or at least tried to. I will survive it so will the page, and at the end of the day I will be sad for the people that are so empty inside that they must hurt others to make themselves feel better.

Sad truth is though that most witch hunts like the one that I just lived through originate right from within the witch community. There is always one debate or another about how witchy this one is or that one, these are things I refuse to be a part of, we are all witches of our own kind at the end of the day. No matter that we all know the same quarters and call them by different names, we all have our own Gods and call them by different names, and all that is just fine by me, I just wish others could be as accepting, or at the very least if it is not for you then just walk away but why try to hurt others as you do? doing that doesn't make you a very good witch or human for that matter.

Needless to say days later the page is still feeling the effects now thanks to the wonderful way that Facebook does things, which in turn affects my life.....so yay you! you won on this occasion you wanted to hurt me and you did, yay you! hope it makes you feel a tiny bit of joy in that cold heart of yours, me I am going to scrape my knees off and pick up again and keep going......bigger, better and moving on, I have heaps of experience on this subject, not giving up is my specialty!

Blessings, love, hugs and smiles to all those that want them!